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0 - 1 YEAR
At this stage in life, the concepts of right and wrong are not possible to
teach. Rather, an infant who is shown warmth, cuddling and loving attention
is likely to grow into a healthy and happy adult.
1 - 2 YEARS
Rather than scolding a child or arguing with him about misbehaver, try to
take preventative measures beforehand. If you don't want him pulling things
out the cupboards, make sure they are secured. At this age of short
attention span,
discipline beyond a simple "no" is unnecessary and can have undesirable
effects.
2 - 4 YEARS
Children of this age, unable to understand abstractions such as generosity
and truth, imitate their parents. So set an example. Be firm in disallowing
undesirable behavior, but do so in a kind and friendly manner, without
attempting to explain why. This is the time where you can really take
some positive steps to reinforce your child's positive behavior. Give him
lots of praise when it's due. Children of this age respond well to simple
reasoning and explanations. Concepts such as truthfulness and generosity can
be introduced. Continue to set an example of acceptable behavior. The child
at this stage wants to please you and wants to be liked by others.
5 - 8 YEARS
Children develop a greater social awareness at this age. They understand the
basic rights of others when taught fairness, values and the need to follow
certain rules of behavior. Rules and limitations not only seem just to the
child, but give him a
good feeling of security.
8 - 11 YEARS
Due to natural growth and influences outside the home, your child has likely
become more independent. He may begin to question your decisions, contradict
or argue. You must remain firm in the important matters and flexible in less
important ones. Demonstrate and discuss the child's duties and
responsibilities to friends, relatives and society. Set examples of moral
behavior. Sex education can also be important at this stage.
12 - 17 YEARS
These are normally rebellious years for most teenagers. In fact, teenagers
who never rebel are probably in emotional trouble. As a parent you must
weather the storm when your teenager begins to question and test
conventional values, rules and beliefs. If you've instilled a sense of
values at an early age, chances are he still retains many of those ideas.
Try to keep lines of communication open and don't push the panic button. If
communication does break down and tensions mount considerably, seek
professional help.
18 YEARS AND OVER
At this stage most young adults are forming, or have formed, their own set
of values. However, life still holds for them many unanswered questions, and
a warm yet honest relationship can still go a long way in helping them reach
mature adulthood.
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Edited by Epstein LaRue, RN, BS, author
of Love At First Type, Crazy Thoughts of Passion, and Highway Hypodermics.
www.epsteinlarue.com |
